Tony and Barbara's Story

Life changed overnight

Tony and Barbara have been married since 1967 and have four children and eight grandchildren, all who live close by and give support.  Tony was a very fit and active 74 year old who was still helping his children renovate their house, gardening at home, Pall Bearer at funerals and seasonal beater on game shoots. Having beaten testicular, prostate skin and lung cancer, in November 2019, Tony experienced a life-changing brain bleed and stroke , which had a profound effect on hits mobility and cognitive functions.

Barbara is now his full-time carer, with back up from their daughter who lives close by. This can be very demanding, particularly given their size difference as Barbara is 5 feet tall and Tony is 6 feet. Barbara has to assist him in everything he does as his cognitive impairment prevents him working out everyday actions such as using a remote, phone, dressing, board games and writing among others, his spacial awareness has been affected. Additionally Tony’s immobility makes balancing difficult for washing, walking (he mainly uses a wheelchair), getting in and out of bed, chairs, cars and sitting up without support. His lack of progress is mainly due to loss of support when COVID arrived a month after leaving hospital.

Barbara was desperate for help and found Oxford Head Injury Service, which was their lifesaver. Tony wanted an accessible gym and Barbara needed respite and support – both of which Oxford Head Injury Services provided. Eighteen months later, Tony fell and required a hip replacement. Two years after that, he began experiencing epileptic seizures, which significantly affected the progress he had made.

Throughout these setbacks, Tony and Barbara continued to receive support from OHIS. The Centre has provided Tony with important routine and social interaction, while weekly visits to the farm have become a particular highlight, reconnecting him with something he enjoyed when he was younger and helped his stepfather.

Barbara says: ” Life would be so much harder without OHIS, it gives us a break from each other and it is a very happy place.” Tony didn’t lose his speech so he looks forward to having social interaction with like minded people and staff at OHIS who we have both made great friends with. There are lots of different activities to help individual brain injuries but Tony has always been a physical man and spends most of his time in the specially adapted gym with neuro physiotherapists to assist.  It makes him happy that he can be active there as he feels it keeps his body and mind healthy which he can’t do at home.  He describes the feeling he has when entering OHIS as being greeted by a huge hug.”